Category: Imposter Syndrome

  • High Performer But, Despite The Evidence, Do Not Feel High Performing On The Inside? 

    High Performer But, Despite The Evidence, Do Not Feel High Performing On The Inside? 

    Imposter syndrome. A state of permanently feeling that you are not as good as people think, that deep down you are faking it. That it is only a matter of time before your cover gets blown. I have worked with so many high flying clients – managing entire departments of hundreds of people, for example (and very competently too) – who still believe that they are just not up to it, they’re just winging it. And are constantly afraid they’ll get found out.

    It’s perhaps worth saying that some people will find mindset strategies all that they need to overcome these sort of doubts in those moments. A bit of a pep talk with yourself, pointing out the evidence that you are doing a good job, giving yourself encouragement when you’ve done something well. This sort of ‘Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway’ approach can pay dividends at times of uncertainty and challenge.

    But there is also a large group of people whose imposter syndrome is rooted in long-term emotional programming, hard-wired enough that it can overwhelm the coping brain when under pressure or external scrutiny. Cue brain fog, going blank, heightened anxiety, or even feeling too paralysed to act.

    For these people, a deeply felt sense of shame or of being irredeemably flawed often underpins their whole existence, meaning that they can be terrified of other people noticing that they are not ‘perfect’. Because when people see this, the fear is they will be able to see the deep down flaw in your being, and will reject you.

    In these cases, positive affirmations will only scratch the surface. I’d recommend finding a decent coach or therapist with a good understanding of the deeper roots of imposter syndrome. Because unless these roots are understood and addressed, nothing fundamental will change.

    I have worked with high performers over the last three decades who, despite the evidence, do not feel high performing on the inside. I might have an idea or two to help you. Let’s talk.  

  • The Secret to Resolving Imposter Syndrome

    The Secret to Resolving Imposter Syndrome

    “Even when I sold my business for $66 million, I felt like an absolute fraud!”
    -Shark Tank judge and real estate mogul, Barbara Corcoran

    This is what imposter syndrome looks like. So many highly capable people experience it. On the outside, you’re highly competent. On the inside, you’re quaking, afraid to be found out to be the incompetent person you truly believe you are.

    As you may have found, it can sometimes be helpful to find a strategy that helps you step out of your ‘not good enough’ head into your ‘capable self’. This is a brilliant mind shift that can instantly bring a change to mood and outcome. 

    However… Mindset strategies on their own are only part of the story. What many people don’t realise is that confidence / self esteem / positive mindset (however you prefer to label it) is held in two distinct places. 

    The one that responds to mindset type strategies is found in the cortex, the verbal / thinking brain. This one responds best to positive messages, a shift in perspective, evidence of achievements.

    But underlying this is the emotional brain. It is mostly non verbal. It operates very differently to the verbal brain. And this is where our core sense of worth develops. Whether we are good enough, not good enough, a fake, a fraud, confident in our own skin.

    This part of our self esteem cannot respond to mindset level strategies. It is present as a deeply held belief. Logic won’t get a look in because we know and feel that we are not good enough. It needs depth psychotherapy or depth coaching for it to be reached and to update its early programming. It’s one of the things I help high performers with, in my role as a Resilient Success coach.